Evolution of the Valentine

Remember having to choose just the right Valentine for each person out of the box of preprinted “Love, Me’s” your mom bought? Then you would meticulously write their name on the front of the little envelope (You know the ones with the glue that taste like dissolved vitamins, and I’m not talking Flinstones – no I’m talking your mom’s vitamins, the ones with extra iron.) And then after all the yuck and the muck stuck to your tongue, the dumb, stupid flap wouldn’t stick. Yeah, those valentines and those dumb, stupid little envelopes.

After spending the entire weekend before Valentine’s Day sweating in preparation and adolescent angst as to whether Jody Coyote or Greg “He touched my hand, I’ll never wash it again” Reed liked your card (yeah, I know I was hedging my bets even back then, albeit in vane) you find out that Pammy Wilkerson was smart enough to specifically add well chosen Conversation Hearts to get her message across, win the boys, and the day. Actually it was Pammy who yelled, “Greg Reed touched my hand, I’m never going to wash it again. He’s meeting me on the monkey bars at lunch.” Now this is before girls were allowed to wear shorts or pants to school. Back in a time when showing panties on the twirling bar and jungle gym was an every day occurrence. Back before it was taboo to us. So you know what Greg was really there for? Yeah, that’s right, twirling until you puked up those Conversation Hearts.



It became a race far too important to leave to preprinted cartoon characters, and by the third grade I was working to leave Pammy Wilkerson in the dust. I’d placed my eyes on new toys in the school yard, I was on a conquest. I toiled with paper lace doilies, pink and red construction paper, Elmer’s paste, and markers that would indelibly let Danny Buzzelli know I WANTED HIM to be my Valentine. Alas. Mon Dieu. Son of a biscuit eating basketball player, Kathy Gaston stole the day and Dan’s eight year old heart (no twirling required – because we didn’t twirl anymore, no we played hopscotch and tetherball now for hours on end.) Kathy, armed with glitter and all the latest Beatles 45’s knew all the right things to say on her doily hearts.



Today I say it with Chocolate; lots of Chocolate (because Ducky only knows four food groups – cheese, crackers, dip, and chocolate – not necessarily in that order, but really close,) music, and several of the best that Hallmark has to offer. There is almond toffee by the coffee maker, Reese’s peanut butter hearts on his steering wheel, Dove chocolate hearts in his lunch, and a Johnny Cash CD in his overnight bag (nothing says “I Love You” more than buying music you can’t stand for the one you love) with Hershey’s Cherry Cordial Kisses in the pockets of his Levis.



But what did my Ducky do? He One Upped Me….BIG TIME!

I ♥ My Ducky!

And those fancy ass chocolate covered strawberries he got me.



Happy Valentine’s and Lots of Chocolate Love coming your way.

Sith,
Cele